


I'm Drunk, let's change everything

by wordsandwickedthings



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Drunken Confessions, M/M, Simon is confused, Sort Of, and pining, baz is wasted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-22
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2020-10-26 06:41:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20737892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordsandwickedthings/pseuds/wordsandwickedthings
Summary: Baz's friends convince him to go to a party because he's been mopping around a lot lately. After too many shots, struggling to get up the staircase to his room, and completely trashing his desk, he accidentally confesses his barely secret crush on a certain golden boy roommate.But drunken confessions are rarely taken seriously, however, earnest as they may be.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> obviously, you should drink responsibly and try to be sober when you confess feelings.
> 
> this has been an Adrian PSA.

The world was spinning. 

But not the normal spinning that it usually did, the kind that was so slow that usually it didn’t interrupt day to day activity; this time it was spinning so quickly Baz couldn’t keep his balance, fumbling to keep from falling down the stairs. 

The mage must have thought he was really funny putting the nemeses at the top of a fucking tower. 

Baz gripped the railing until his knuckles turned white, dragging himself upward, in hopes that he would maybe make it to his bed before the sun comes up. Fuck Niall and Dev for forcing him out that night, fuck Jess for having a party on a Wednesday, fuck the mage for putting his bed at the top of a spiraling staircase, fuck himself for thinking tequila shots would get rid of his problems. 

What’s worse is that he didn’t even want to go out that night at all, he was perfectly content to lay in his bed all night and mope. His best friends weren’t having it though, clearly pissed off that he had been doing nothing but sulking for the past couple of weeks. 

“Pining,” Niall had said after few shots. “you’re fucking pining man.” 

Baz had shaken his head, shoving the other boy's shoulder, “And what would I have to pine over.” 

“come on man,” his best friend looked on the verge of laughing in his face, “you don’t hide it well.” 

“I hate him.” Baz downed another shot. 

Niall followed his action, and poured them another round they didn’t need, “a part of you does I’m sure.” 

And now he was in front of his door, holding the frame to keep himself upright, and all he could think was fuck Simon Snow for making him feel like this – all mopey and vulnerable and shit. The stupid chosen one who was probably on the other side of the door right now, asleep and unknowing of all the mess he has caused. 

The vampire held back his grumbles and turned the doorknob, ready to go back to bed and live there for the proceeding future. 

Instead, Baz lost his balance and crashed to the floor with a thud.

From across the room, he heard Snow mumbling, waking from his sleep. He tried to get back up, not in the mood to deal with the miracle boy in the state he was in. He tried to pull himself up using the desk that next to the door, but it just jerked forward from his weight, causing everything that was on it to fall to the floor around him. 

“Crowley, Baz,” Snow yawned from his bed, “what the fuck are you doing?” 

Baz let his back hit the floor; I’m just going to sleep here, he thought, here is fine. 

His eyes were only closed for a moment before he felt someone stand next to his head, “what are you doing?” 

“Plotting.” He slurred. When had he started slurring? 

He opened his eyes to see Simon peering down at him, his eyebrow arched. 

Fuck Simon Snow for being pretty. 

“wouldn’t it be more comfortable in your bed?” 

Baz shrugged, “how swe- sweet of you to care.” He tried to force the lopsided smile off his face. 

Simon gave him a knowing glare, “how drunk are you?” 

Baz ignored him, trying again to get up off the ground. He made it farther than last time, managing to make it to his feet before he collapsed again. 

He didn’t hit the floor this time, though. Simon rushed forward and grabbed his sides, forcing Baz to grab the golden boy’s shoulders to stay upright. “what the hell, Baz?” he tried to pull the drunk boy to his bed, but the raven-haired boy jerked back, hitting the desk. 

“Nope, no, no touchy!” he wagged his finger at the blonde. 

Simon scoffed, moving towards him, “no, no,” Baz put his arms between him, “when you touch,” he hiccupped, “me It tin – tingles.” 

“tingles?” the other boy asked. 

“you k-know.” Baz kept his arm outstretched, even though Simon had backed off, “you know, like elec – electr – Zappy-shit under my skin.” 

Simon just shook his head, “you are so drunk.” 

Baz scrunched his face into fake confusion, “oh shit really? I ha-hadn’t noticed.” 

The chosen one laughed at that, batting away Baz’s arm so he can grab his biceps, “come on, Pitch, time for bed.” 

He stumbled closer to Simon, forgetting to fight the feeling that he had so adamantly protested a moment ago. He grabbed at Simon’s shirt to keep steady, “what about the – the fluttering?” 

“fluttering?” the way he spoke was like he was talking to a child, “I thought it was zapping?” 

“it’s eve – everything.” Baz tried to take a step, instead of falling more. Simon wrapped his arm around the other boy’s waist, as Baz’s head fell to the crook for his neck.  
This is weird, baz thought, enemies don’t touch like this. 

How does Simon go to from never getting within 10 feet of him to holding him without hesitating?

“I feel everything when you touch me,” he slurred out, despite a part of his brain telling him to shut up. 

He lifted his head to be met with Snow's confused face, “what does that even mean?” 

“you are so dumb,” Baz told him, curling his fists into the fabric above Simon’s shoulders. 

“Yeah, you tell me that all the time, but that still doesn’t tell me what you me-”

Baz pressed his mouth against Simons without thinking, probably with more force than was necessary. The golden-haired boy clearly wasn’t expecting it though, stumbling back – taking the Baz with him – till they crash on the floor again. 

Hello, old friend, Baz thought as he pulled himself off the other boy to pat the wood. 

He couldn’t get up all the way, stumbling until he was laying on his side next to Simon. Oh, right. I’m drunk. Baz wanted to laugh, but the sound didn’t escape him when he looked at the way the chosen one’s chest was rising and falling rapidly. 

“are you –“ Baz swallowed, “are you okay?” 

Simon turned to him, eyes wide and confused like they always were. The looked faded, though, when he saw Baz laying there – eyes closed and mouth hanging open, “you’re unbelievably, unbearably drunk.” 

Baz giggled, “you keep saying that.” He didn’t think before he reached out, tracing the tip of his finger along Simon’s bottom lip. The drunk boy relished in the sharp inhale of breath that came out of the other. 

He didn’t think when he moved to try and press his lips to Simons, again.

Then the golden boy was standing, and the vampire had to blink at how rapidly it had happened. 

“You shouldn’t do that,” Simon mumbled. 

The vampire’s chest heaved, “oh, right, I forgot,” Baz let out a laugh, “mortal enemies.” 

He let out a scoff, reaching his arm out to Baz, “come on, you need to sleep.” 

The other boy didn’t want to argue. In truth, he didn’t want to do anything really. He knew this would be the outcome; sober Baz had run the scenario through his head more times than he could count, most of them ended in violence, some of them ended in Snow laughing in his face, once or twice they had ended with Snow stabbing him in the heart with a steak – Crowley, he needed therapy. 

Simon had managed to haul him off the floor and onto his bed as Baz recounted every dream that he had ever had about the boy practically carrying him. 

“try to stay awake while I get you some aspirin,” the miracle boy told him, already halfway to the bathroom. “it’ll help for the morning.” 

“How does the mages,” he hiccupped, “golden boy know how to combat hangovers?” Baz focused on the light of the bathroom, moving his shoulders to a rhythm in his head. 

he didn’t expect Simon to be this kind to when he was wasted – he didn’t expect Simon to be kind to him in general. 

“shut up,” the golden boy told him when he got back to the bed, plopping next to Baz as he helped him sit up.

Simon pushed the pills between the vampire’s lips, ignoring how Baz kissed his palm as it retreated to bring the water up. 

Once the pills were down, Simon retreated. He was back to his own bed before Baz could even process what was going on, muttering, “get some sleep, Baz.” 

Sleeping didn’t feel right – though, his body was begging him too. He looked over to Simon, already in bed with his back turned to Baz as if nothing had happened at all, “why do you hate me?” 

Simon sighed and rolled around to face him, “what?” 

Baz swallowed, watching the miracle boy. This isn’t how it’s supposed to be, he’s supposed to get drunk and laugh and dance and come home to crash in his bed and wake up tomorrow with a killer headache and a sore throat. He’s not supposed to be watching confusion twisted onto his roommate’s face as he tries to think of every moment that brought him here. 

“I – I,” Simon stuttered, “I mean you’re a vampire. You drink blood. I mean… I think you do, I have no proof, but I am like eighty percent sure.” 

“not human’s blood,” Baz said, snuggling into his pillow. 

“what?” 

He shrugged, “Don’t worry about it.” 

“Baz,” Simon’s voice was delicate, and the vampire almost didn’t hear it, “I don’t – I don’t know. Just, sleep, okay.” The chosen boy rolled over again, effectively ending whatever Baz had hoped to gain from the conversation. 

He did. Eventually. He fell asleep watching the rise and fall of Simon’s shoulders – tempted to count the freckles along his back. 

Fuck Simon Snow for making him feel like this.


	2. i'm sober, what happened?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baz wakes up the next day with a killer hangover and a fuzzy recollection of what had happened the night before. When Simon gets back from class, he tries to resolve what had happened the night before. the night Baz may or may not remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you didn't take my advice from the last chapter, I recommend a morning of honest conversation!  
don't be emotionally inept like the boyz.

The world wasn’t spinning anymore. It was pounding. 

Or maybe that was just Baz skull. 

Either way, Baz woke up in agony – his head was throbbing, and his throat was sore, an aftermath of partying he still wasn’t completely use to. 

The first thing he thought about is how the dorm room was too silent, the only sound was the beating of Baz’s brain as he stretched his aching limbs. Snow had already left for breakfast, probably best – he didn’t need to get into a fight with him with a hangover like this. 

He rolled out of his bed reluctantly, barely sparing a glance at the clock that confirmed he had missed his first two classes of the day. Who the hell has a party on a Wednesday?  
Baz replayed the night's events in his head as he stumbled to the bathroom, trying to avoid his reflection in the mirror; or at least he tried to replay them, anyways, most of the events after shot three were hazy at best. 

Memories of Niall and Dev pushing shots towards him, and dragging him to a group of girls to dance – Baz had been dubbed the official wingman of that night, mostly as a tactic to get him out of the corner he had nestled himself in. 

Memories of falling also faded in and out of his memory; That would explain the dull ache of his back. 

Memories of Simon Snow batting at him came to mind, of the two enemies crashing to the ground, and Snow dragging him to his bed. Baz didn’t quite trust the memories swimming in his head, he never really woke the chosen one up when he would come home drunk – not that it was a common occurrence, but every once and awhile he got dragged out of the comfort of his room to join the rest of society. 

When Baz opened the bathroom door and finally looked at the dorm room, he had to acknowledge one hazy memory was real – he definitely fell. His books and stationery were scattered across the floor, more than one assignment crumpled. Fantastic. 

Baz was going to have to clean that up. “later,” he breathed out, crawling back into bed – fading out as fast as he woke. 

\---

He didn’t wake up again until later that afternoon, opening his eyes to find Snow picking papers up off the floor. 

Baz spared another glance at the clock, “You’re missing divination, Miracle boy.” 

Snow flinched but didn’t look back at him, “uh, yeah. Mr. Doe had a premonition about the world ending around 5th hour, so he canceled the class.” 

“Yeah, that sounds about right.” 

“how is you head?” Snow still wasn’t looking at him, stacking papers on the corner of the desk.

“Fucking atrocious,” Baz grumbled, sitting up. “you don’t have to do that, you know.” 

The other boy shrugged, “I figured your head would hurt after last night, no big deal.” 

The vampire frowned; Snow was acting weird. Well, weirder than usual.

Usually, he didn’t ignore Baz like this – he couldn’t go an hour without accusing Baz of something torturous. And even when Snow was ignoring him for whatever reason, he’s never flat out not looked at him. 

He tried to think back to the night before, searching for any moment he pissed Snow off more than any other day. 

He couldn’t come up with anything that he would consider worse than how he normally was. 

Baz forced himself out of bed, he really didn’t want to deal with his roommate at a time like this.

He shuffled over to tower over the golden boy. “did I bother you last night?” 

Snow kept his gaze down at the mess, “No. what? Why would you-” the apples of the miracle boy’s cheeks tinted pink, and the vampire didn’t know what to do with that fact.  
“Crowley,” Baz groaned, dropping to his knees in front of Simon, “are we just not going to address anything ever now, huh?” 

“I’m not NOT addressing anything,” Snow said, scooping up a handful of pens and putting it in the mug that usually sat next to his lamp. 

That didn’t break, Baz thought, sick. 

“Dude, you won’t look at me,” the raven-haired boy huffed, “Something is obviously not being addressed.” 

Snow finally looked, locking his jaw when he stared in the other boy’s eyes. Baz tried to look back the best he could, but there was something in the way the golden boy was watching him that made him fidget. 

“Do you even remember anything from last night?” Simon’s cheeks were still pink. 

“I remember some of it,” Baz said, jutting his bottom lip out. He didn’t like Snow insinuating he was clueless in the argument HE was a part of. Even if his memory of the previous night could be considered subpar at best. 

Simon chuckled, “oh, okay.” He jumped up, tossing the rest of the papers onto the desk, “enlighten me then.” 

Baz followed him like a lost dog, “okay!” 

The miracle boy sat on his bed, leaning on the palms of hands, “okay.” 

Baz opened his mouth, fully intended to recount every single event that played out the previous night, “I…fell.” 

“You did.” 

“It…hurt?” he was never going to live this down. 

“I’m assuming the first time did.” Snow wasn’t passively aggressively ignoring him now – this was very aggressive. 

“the first time?!” 

The Chosen one laughed this time; a loud, boisterous laugh that caused knots in Baz’s stomach. “Yeah,” he said, “the second time you used me as a cushion.”

“Oh.” What the fuck was Baz supposed to say to that? “I’m sorry.” 

Snow just shrugged. 

“so that’s why you’re mad at me?” Baz grit his teeth, a little more pissed off than before. “Because I fell on you?” 

The other boy looked like he was about to protest but instead just said, “Yeah, Baz, Sure.” 

He forced out a chuckle, “Convincing.” 

“does it even matter?” the miracle boy finally snapped, throwing his hands up overdramatically, “since when do you care if I’m annoyed at you.” 

Baz grabbed at his shoulders without thinking, curling his fingers into the fabric of his shirt, “because you’ve never acted like this before.” 

Snow looked down at his hands, his cheeks going pink again, “do you still feel everything when you touch me?” 

“wh-what?” 

“You know,” Snow said, the corner of his mouth tipped into a smirk, “do you feel the zappy-shit under your skin.” He reached out and tapped his fingers against Baz’s skin.  
Baz did, in fact, feel the Zappy shit where his hands are curled around Simon, but how Snow knew that was beyond him. 

He squeezed his eyes shut. “Crowley, how bad was I last night?” 

the other boy chuckled, “uh, do you really want to know?” 

Baz released his grip from Snow’s shirt, backing as far away from him as he mustered. “so that’s why you’re mad at me? Cause I made you uncomfortable.” Baz scrubbed his hands over his face, “look, I’m sorry-”

“I didn’t-”

“Whatever I did, can we just ignore it.” 

“you don’t even kno-”

“can you just spare me some more embarrassment and not talk about-” Baz hit a wall. When did they put a wall there?

“Alastair Crowley, Shut up Baz!” 

The screaming did shut Baz up. 

“will you just listen to me for one goddamn second?” Snow stood up, moving in front of where Baz had cocooned himself – trying to get the other boy to look at him. “you didn’t make me uncomfortable. Well, you did at first,” he waved his hand dramatically when he saw the look that washed over Baz’s face, “but, BUT, that was only because I was confused. You had never really acted like that before, even when you were drunk so naturally, I was a little taken aback.” 

The vampire swallowed, trying to force down the lump in his throat. “So, are you still confused?” 

Snow forced his hands into his pocket, his eyes searching Baz’s as if he had the key to the universe behind it. “yes,” he breathed, stepping closer to the other boy. 

“What is there to be confused about? I said we don’t have to talk about it again.” 

The chosen boy reached out, pressing his index finger against the other's bicep. He pulled back quickly as if Baz had burned him, “maybe I feel everything too,” he said softly, “maybe that’s why I’m confused.” 

“what?” 

Snow was still staring at him, “maybe when you kissed me, I felt everything.” 

“I WHAT?” 

“Oh right,” Simon burst out laughing, pressing his fingers against Baz’s exposed arm again, “drunk.” 

“yeah.” Baz laughed with him, “I’m sober now though – if you want to figure out what’s confusing you.” 

“I was more wondering if I’d still feel everything if I touched you.” Simon wrapped his hand around the curve of Baz’s muscle. 

“Do you?” Baz couldn’t breathe, fuck, he really wasn’t breaking. 

“yeah,” he tilted his head, “it isn’t as intense as when you kissed me, but I feel it.” 

Baz tried to contain his smile, “I mean I could again, you know, so you’re not confused.” 

Simon didn’t contain his smile, “okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> follow me to find out what kind of person I am!  
tumblr - ravenclawsarepunkrock & wordsandwickedthings  
twitter - @just_adrie  
instagram - just.adrie 
> 
> * I want to actually start using my twitter and insta so follow them so I don't feel like I'm screaming into the void too much :)

**Author's Note:**

> in case anyone cares or is curious what kinda person I am  
Tumblrs- ravenclawsarepunkrock (main)  
wordsandwickedthings (writing blog)


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